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  • » Name: Amanda Bassa
  • » Location: VA
  • » Member Since: 09/21/07
  • » Bio: student, future change maker, and everything you wouldn't expect me to be.
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The Undisputed Truth

Virginia is for (Crack) Lovers


May 12, 2008 | Tags: none

Well, another round of final exams is out of the way and I get…well, six days of vacation before I start the new nine to five. I actually did some serious studying for once instead of just glancing over notes for five minutes before my exams, and for some reason studying makes you hungry. So, while eating the unhealthiest shit known to mankind in order to keep myself awake and energized, I decided to catch up on some of the music that has come out lately that I hadn’t had a chance to listen to yet.

That’s when I ran into the Re-Up Gang’s “We Got It For Cheap: Vol. 3” hiding on my hard drive. Crack rap > final exams*. I may not like crack in real life, but I can’t get enough of that shit in music.

I feel so late for not getting to that bit of music sooner. It got me thinking about something though: who else in VA is fucking with The Clipse?! Nobody. Let’s think about what at least fairly well known emcees The Commonwealth has spawned. Missy Elliot, Pharrell Williams, Skillz, Timbaland…am I forgetting anybody? Somehow I don’t think so, since apparently Virginia isn’t exactly a breeding ground for talented lyricists. Just ask my inbox. I get DMV shit sent to me on the daily, but I’d say about 1% of what I receive is from Virginia. Maryland is holding down the DMV as far as hip hop is concerned right now. And we can thank gentrification for that, since everybody is getting kicked the fuck out of DC via rising prices and renovations of previously shitty areas and moving their asses to PG County. Damn.

Anyway, back to VA emcees. Virginia really doesn’t have a lot of bragging rights, does it? Even weirder is that every name in question is from Southern Virginia. Now, I know this is going to ruffle a few feathers, but have any of you ever been to Southern VA?! Virginia Beach perhaps? I’ve been to Pharrell’s high school, I’ve been around that city, and honestly? I’ll pass. I’ve never seen so many 7-11’s in one city in my life. It’s like they’re on every block. You’re barely out of the door and just beginning to put a dent in your slurpee before you walk past another 7-11. Not to mention that there are some straight nutjobs down there. I hope they’re just tourists. Beach hopping people from the Carolinas or something. And word of advice if you go down there and decide to walk around on foot: keep your eyes open, because there’s skateboarders everywhere and you don’t want to end up a pedestrian hit and run casualty. Although it’s hard to miss them when they’re rolling around with purple mohawks and shit.

I think my boy Modi said it best: “there isn’t a damn cool thing about that place. And everybody is slum. Now I know what UVA people mean when they get unhappy about the 757 “locals” frequenting their parties.” Ouch. But the truth hurts.

So it leaves me to wonder – how did something so cracktastic come out of somewhere so utterly unappealing? At this point I’m left with the conclusion that the whole hustlin’ crack talk is simply just an act like it is with 99% of artists these days. Surprising? Not so much. I mean, I’d hope that living in VA (aka home of every variety of fed you could possibly think of – CIA headquarters are here in VA, Quantico, along with the Pentagon that houses the Department of Defense, etc.) would at least teach them to know better than to self-incriminate on record. Which ultimately means the crack rap gimmick is nothing but a farce. It’s slightly disappointing, in the most guilty pleasure-ish way possible. And this is the best thing that VA has going for it rap-wise? The Commonwealth needs to step its game up – especially Northern VA. Don’t get me wrong, I fucks with The Clipse, I just think that VA needs to catch up with the rest of the Mid-Atlantic area, and the nation in general. We’re really falling behind. Just another stop along I-95 where you get some food, take a piss, and keep it pushin’ until you get to Howard’s homecoming.

Oh, and I’m leaving Chris Brown out of this. First of all he’s not a rapper, and second of all, if you’ve ever seen Tappahannock, VA, then you’d realize that he really isn’t helping our state’s argument out at all. Never in a million years did I think I’d hear somebody shouting out Tappahannock on a record**. Just when you think you’ve seen it all…

I’m so not cut out for rural areas. And also don’t get me wrong – Virginia is for lovers, and I love me some Virginia. I’m just staying my ass in the region that’s Metro accessible. That’s all.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I got track 11 off of “We Got It For Cheap: Vol. 3” on repeat and some crucial post-Spring semester sleep to catch up on. It feels good to be back.

  

 

 

*I am by no means endorsing the usage, selling, or even discussing of crack. Stay in school, kids.

**Even worse? If you glance quickly at the word "Tappahannock", it looks slightly dirty. I'll avoid making the blog X-rated though, considering I know that my moms glances at this thing every now and then. Oh, the disadvantages of not coming up with some catchy nickname for yourself. Consider the brief lack of profanity a late Mother's Day gift, Mom. Love you!


The views and opinions expressed in this blog are those of the writer and not necessarily those of HipHopDX.com or Cheri Media Group.

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