June 01, 2007 | Tags: none
With all the rap lists that popped up over the past few weeks (mine included), I can honestly say that this is the best one I’ve read. Without further adieu here’s my Central American blogging brother from another mother, Belize...Your ears are important! Did you know that your ear not only detects sound, but it also is the main factor in the sense of balance and body position? Ill shyt huh? So I feel sorry for all the poor souls that lose that important niche in their life, simply because they bought an overly promoted wack CD. It’s a fucking crime I say! Fuck a Cam’Ron, I'm snitching! The corruption of eardrums has reached its peek and I must do a Hiro and fix this shyt - or die trying. Werd!
Many writers recently contributed to giving their Top 25 albums, in fact a group of bloggers recently united to create a Top 25 list (although I call them fuckin' cheaters for not sticking to the one artist rule, but whatever).
Well, my list is different. These albums signify the ideal term of Garbage a/k/a Trash a/k/a Fuckin’ Terrible (You get the point right?). So, here it is - if you want to prevent early hearing loss, loss of balance and bad positioning- leave 'em on the shelf. Please, it’s only for your best interest.
*BTW, if an album fucked up your eardrums, please feel free to let me know so that fellow readers can be warned - in advance.
25. The Love Movement (A Tribe Called Quest) - Classic group. Classic albums. Yet they decided to part ways with a grand finale CD, instead I got this. Perfect way to end a classic career huh? Still waiting on that reunion album Tip... still waiting...
24. Nastradamus (Nas) - I remember it like yesterday, Nas was on the cover of XXL magazine, burning the shyt out of The Source. His album I Am just came out and it was banging - hard (nhjic). I opened the CD pamphlet and saw the Nastradamus ad. First thing I thought was - " WoW! Another one, already?" I was geeked for months. When the CD dropped I thought I was gonna be listening to sum NY State of Mind type shyt- Negative homes. I still got nightmares of this shyt.
23. Kiss Tha Game Goodbye (Jadakiss) - Let me first say that I am a Lox fan. I love Jada! That's why when I bought this CD I kept bumpin' 7 tracks. Then I realized that there were 21 cuts, and the best song was a skit. Shyt, unless you like wasting money- stay away. I bet nobody had the desire to listen to this shyt in years. I bet...
22. Tha Doggfather (Snoop Dogg) - The hype was great. The stakes were high. Pac dies, Dre left. Time to show and prove Snoop. Can we say pre-Dirk Meltdown?
21. Brothers From Another (Young Gunz) - If you own this CD - jump off a bridge.
20. 534 (Memphis Bleek) - Jay-Z retired. Beans is in jail. M.A.D.E was solid, yet The Carter Administration's plan was not to create classics but to kill eardrums. The nerve!
19. 10 (LL Cool J) - I gave LL credit until this album because before this shyt sandwich, he at least had one street banger. I guess pussy can do that from time to time (c) #11.
18. Young & Thuggin ' (Turk) - Every Hot Boy fan cringed at this release, especially since cats were arguing about who was better - Turk or Weezy...
17. Last Temptation (Ja Rule) - Some unknown rapper from Queens starts to call you pussy, matter of fact he makes a song about pussy and uses our name as the hook. Niggaz is starting to question your machismo, and what do you do? Well, you all know by now.
16. Ridin' High (8Ball and MJG) - All I gotta say is Track 9 made me ashamed to be a 8Ball/ MJG fan....
15. World Party (Goodie Mob) - Just look at the cover... did you expect a classic?
14. Midwest Cowboy (Bizzy Bone) - As far as lyrics go, Bizzy is spittin... but the beats are like hearing Michael Jackson's inner thoughts at a day care center. Scary.
13. Infamy (Mobb Deep) - Let me take you back. Jay-Z ethered Prodigy, onstage and on wax. The single came out and cats were loving it - then this CD dropped, which made everybody forget how great Murda Muzik was.
12. Blueprint 2: The Gift & The Curse (Jay-Z) - Save your money, cop the much slimmer 2.1 version.
11. Electric Circus (Common) - Yes, even great MC's get pussy whooped.
10. Year Of The Dog, Again (DMX) - Retired. Came back. Left Def Jam. Resigned to Columbia. What do you get? The equivalence of Garbage Water.
9. Loyal To The Game (2 Pac) - The way Eminem butchered these Pac classics are damn near unforgivable. However, if your a Pac fan and your one of those "I gotta have every CD", just know that DJ Quik, Scott Storch and Red Spyda save the day. Those beats make Eminem look like the beat making amateur that he really is.
8. Born Again (Notorious B.I.G.) - Not even 2 hot singles could save this disaster.
7. Tical 0 (Method Man) - The only good thing I can say about this CD was that it gave Meth the spark needed to make 4:21.
6. Split Personality (Cassidy) - I wouldn't recommend this CD to my worst enemy.
5. Killa Season (Cam’Ron) - Which was worse? The DVD or this? Even DipSet fans regretted this shyt-of-a-mess.
4. Thoughts Of A Predicate Felon (Tony Yayo) - Curtis's favorite album of all time.
3. Can-I-Bus (Canibus) - Read my old post, and realize how much a fuckin’ disappointment this album was. Matter of fact... I'm... done... yeah... I'm done talking about this... gettin' pissed now...
2. Double Up (Ma$e) - I guess when Ma$e said double up, he meant trannies.
1. Opposite Of H2O (Drag-On) - Hot label? Check. Hot mentor? Check. Hot cameos? Check Hot Single? Check.... Hot Album?? Negatives, this my friends is the worst 12 bucks I have ever spent. Avoid this at all cost! Your ears will thank you.
And that's my list... Read...Learn... Thank me later...
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