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Slap-Boxing With Jesus

Jermaine Dupri Must Be Stopped

In case you haven’t noticed, the rap blogging game isn’t what it is anymore. Back in the go-go era when this site’s cyber crack game was at an all time high we had everyone from soopa starrs to wack ninjas getting in where they fit in. Even yours truly was hitting the masses with a nonstop daily flow of that ultimate (e-)high.

But as with everything else, the game got bloated. Everybody wanted a piece of that chicken blog pie, and soon enough most of the OGs either ghosted out or ventured into other avenues.

I’ll be the first to say it (errr, or at least the first to say it here):

BLOGS HAVE OFFICIALLY JUMPED THE SHARK.

Everybody wants to be the next big thing like Brock Lesnar. Rappers stopped rapping and started blogging half-assedly. Whereas before the blogging game was a zone to unleash your inner most thoughts, random freaky tales and pure black hatred (ahem!), what now remains is a swollen arena of carbon copies, stalkers and talentless schmucks, with a couple wannabe web saviors determined to help the dumb, deaf and blind from the likes of, well, me.

I can see why people try to get some getsome though. In this “new media” age where something like a Tay Zonday can land a Dr. Pepper’s commercial of all things, any and everybody can blow like Roxy Reynolds at any given moment. Another perfect example is this is the Black Shang Tsung’s latest signee, some random ass kid he found on YouTube. On a semi-related note, am I the only one who sees that JD plays with more children than Michael Jackson and R. Kelly combined? Something isn’t right with that, especially when that one dark-skinned rapper from Kriss Kross started losing his hair to “leukemia.” Is that what they’re calling it now?

Let me stop.

In his weird, dementia-ridden post (which is obviously edited by some low-level mailroom clerk before it gets thrown up in the hopes that the Huffington Post’s Ritz contingent can understand what he’s spewing) the leader of the Lollipop Gang may have a point. Fans of music want shit now; it’s common knowledge they flock to sites like this to read up on and listen to – or in my case, illegally download repeatedly – the current flavors of the month. At the same time, just because a one-trick pony is hot right now doesn’t mean that the longevity will last. And trying to find new means to acquire new means doesn’t mean a damn thing when everybody else is doing the same thing.

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